Have you ever taken the time to actually observe yourself, let alone study yourself? Svadhyaya is a term that I first heard of many years ago. Svadhyaya is a Sanskrit term that means 'one's own reading' or 'self-study' and it is the fourth Niyama from Patanjali's 8-limbed path of yoga in the Yoga Sutras.
While all of the 8 limbs of yoga resonate and all of the Niyamas are quite important, I find that Svadhyaya is very central to my evolution and happiness. From my personal practice, I do my best to embody clarity (saucha), contentment (santosha), discipline/fire/heat (tapas), and service to a higher power than myself (ishvara pranidhana) when I am able to study my being. Perhaps they are interchangeable, but this is my observation. It all comes through me and my vessel.
If you have never taken the time to really study yourself, the task can feel daunting especially if you are not used to spending uninterrupted, intentional time with yourself. Similarly, if you are feeling ungrounded, studying the self can feel a bit maddening...always being aware of and alert about everything (read hypervigilance). You can go down the spiral of coulda, shoulda, woulda's within a minute. Well, perhaps that isn't self-study but self-deprecation.
Svadhyaya serves its highest purpose when you are grounded and centered.
What can help you ground and center is practicing pratyahara (withdrawing the senses) and bramacharya (energy moderation). You can read about pratyahara here and here. You can read about bramacharya here and here.
The art of awareness.
Studying one’s self is to consistently hold a mirror up to your reactions and responses. In reading books or studying texts that are in alignment with your belief system, how is what you read reflected in your life, how can you incorporate what you have learned to be integrated and then reflected outwards into the world? Become aware of how you show up in different spaces and around different people. Become aware of how your thoughts, words, and deeds align or misalign with The Most High.
Ebb & flow + non-attachment (aparigraha) + untying emotions from the observation.
Self-study is another one of those non-linear aspects of life. We are constantly changing physically, mentally, emotionally, and spiritually, therefore we have the opportunity to consistently be a student of and to ourselves. The more you are able to release how you "should" be, the more room you make for who you actually could be and the greatest possible outcome of who you are (which is aligned with your Highest Self).
Intention.
Be clear about how you are aligning with your highest self, putting in the effort to evolve, and then reviewing the action and effects of that action. It's constant feedback. It is a never-ending journey. In studying yourself, you get to know your truest essence, your most authentic self, your most authentic expression. You learn the language and idiosyncracies of you and your body. When you start learning these things, you can move with more intention. As you witness yourself, you can pick up on patterns regarding people and situations that pull you away from yourself.
Consistency.
The more consistent you are with self-study the better you get at it and the more you learn about and become familiar with the essence of YOU. It's like studying something in school. The more you study and learn, the more you know! Introspection [the examination or observation of one's own mental and emotional processes] and checking in with the body reveal the most information when they are frequently exercised.
Shadow work.
Svadhyaya is not just about studying the cute, pleasurable, "acceptable" parts of yourself. It is about studying EVERY part of yourself without deeming it "good" or "bad".
One of my favorite ways to study myself is mirror work either with an actual mirror or a camera (via picture or video). I look at myself in my eyes, at my body, at my hair. I look at the little details of my physical being. I notice the new beauty mark on my face or where my hair is growing back. This is easiest when I come out of the shower. Pictures, for me, capture the moment of my energy and emotion. I can see a picture of myself and see exactly where my mind was that day (I am not sure if this also happens to other people). I observe how I look different in the present moment than I did in the picture, without any judgment for the changes. Next time you come across a mirror take a look at yourself or take a picture of yourself.
I was introduced to the book Mirror Work by Louise Hay and those prompts definitely shifted me. I would highly recommend checking it out.
Another form of mirror work is recording videos or taking pictures of yourself. This has always been a fun way for me to study myself. I used to record myself attempting to get into yoga asanas, my general asana practice, and dancing. To me, it is a beautiful practice to witness my corporeal expression. Visual images have a way of transporting me back to that time; it is a very visceral experience.
External mirror work.
An external version of mirror work is that you can use your closest friends to reflect who you are back to you. Sometimes life dirties, warps, and cracks our mirrors. If you have people in your tribe who are able to see you for who you truly are and have the capacity to be honest with you, regardless of your ability to witness yourself, lean on them.
Another “external” mirror work/self-study practice is consulting your Chi/Ori and/or your elevated Ancestors. They can show you things about yourself that you may not have been able to see otherwise. When it comes to Ancestors, they have walked the earth before you and may have many insights to impart to you.
Also, regarding Ancestors, studying your kin and lineage for all that it is (the positive, uplifting, negative, embarrassing, hurtful, cowardly, revolutionary, and resilient parts) can provide you with lots of information that can help you on your own journey. In order to move forward, we must know and embrace our past…not just our own, but also from the history of those we descended from. This is the concept of Sankofa.
Lastly, another favorite means of self-study is journaling.
I know this isn't everyone's cup of tea, but for me, journaling allows me to look into my mind and study my patterns, be it physical or thought. Writing, in my journey, is a great way to document me, my feelings, and the events of my life in a particular moment. It is revealing when I look back on past entries to see how much I have changed, shifted, grown, etc. Journaling, for me, allows me to see how far I have come and gives me a reason to celebrate myself. If journaling isn’t your jam, find another way to document yourself and what you are experiencing (audio, video, etc.).
Final notes.
In the moments of witnessing, you will find that there is little room for comparison. Self-study is a way to meet yourself with more curiosity than judgment or hostility because YOU become your mirror. You become your own personal explorer. Because we are in a constant state of shift and evolution, there is always something new to discover about yourself. Who you are today is not who you were 5 years ago. The things you liked last year, you might not like now.
All in all, I pray that you give yourself the gift of witnessing and studying your most authentic self. If you are unable to witness and embrace who you are, ask the people you love the most to hold you and hold the space for you until you feel safe enough to come back to yourself.
In what ways will you engage in self- study? What ways do you already study yourself?
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I love 💚this sis! As always, the universe is always aligned with what I need to work on. My friend gifted me this book for my birthday this month.
The Pivot Year by Brianna Wiest.
"This is the year you change your life.
If you’re in a pivot period—if you’re still bridging the space between where you are and where you want to be—remember that the person you’re becoming is already within you. The journey is convincing your mind to act consistently on what your heart already knows it wants to do.
The Pivot Year is a book of 365 daily meditations on finding the courage to become who you’ve always wanted to be, from the internationally author of 101 Essays That Will Change The Way You Think, The Mountain Is You, and more."
I started doing daily journaling after reading that day's reflection and it has been the most supportive way to self-study!
Sending you lots of love💚🙏🏽